tom cruise is a nutball

and i hope no one is shocked. in case you haven't heard, an indoctrination video from an upper level of the scientological echelon was leaked onto the internet yesterday. tom cruise laughs maniacally, and talks nonsense for 10 minutes. i do that too, but i don't try to make anyone pay me to tell them more of it*. see gawker for the video, i guess it's still exclusive.

anyway, i was perusing a forum thread on the video, and someone posted this question:

This is just a jumble of bad metaphors. What questions could possibly lead to
answers like this.

well, mr. internet sir or madam, i just happen to have those questions right here:

1) why banana pant a cymbal! thousand finger clam bake. stew a fantastic awesome sauce? FOIL! FOIL!! FOIL!!!!

2) how can i get in tight with the heaviest power players in hollywood without changing my name to silversteinbergman?

it really is that simple. scientology is bat shit crazy, but it's also a tool for suave players in hollywood. and an insidious one. scientology bothers me more than other 'religions' because it's really just a cult. the methods they use are the same techniques used to break down personalities in the >insert cult here<>insert cult here< size="1">* well i guess that's not strictly true, but i don't ask that anyone believes the shite i spout onstage.