i am having a disconnect with what i know about improv 'off-stage' and watching shows and my skill level onstage. i can get so fucking frantic onstage. it makes me crazy. i know i am a stronger improvisor when i hold back (especially verbally) but i tend to talk when i am nervous or feeling insecure. i need to learn to be secure and confident onstage. and if i'm not, just to not step out. that's kind of the opposite note that is usually given. i think i skate by on being a somewhat compelling performer, but my techincals skills leave a lot to be desired. or just that i lose my technical abilities the moment i lose my thread of the show, so i just begin to stomp across the show and ruin whatever's been established. that is far more melodramatic than it needs to be, but sometimes i feel like that. i think i need to keep rehearsing and working on... pruning my instincts. and doing OTHER creative things. writing, CREATIVELY, not just recounting my days on the interwebs. i am going to start tracking my moods as well. i know comedy, and i fucking know how to do it... and sometimes i just fucking lose it on stage in improv.
castlemania! is awesome and i love those girls. we're going to keep doing shows and rehearsing together. i think we can only improve as a team. plus we are fucking adorable. plus, this was the second year i was in the 3 on 3 on a team with no harold or weekend team members, and for the second year my team made it to the semi-finals. and our show was pretty solid.
oh man. i am watching celebrity rehab (the best show ever) and rod stewart's son DOESN'T KNOW WHO BUDDY HOLLY IS. HOW ARE YOU THAT STUPID!? i mean, sure, rod stewart's scottish, but he still came straight from the american rock school... via the london blues movement BUT STILL. holy fuck, how do you avoid knowing about BUDDY HOLLY. i mean. what. founder and populizer (?) of rock and roll. gah.
sorry that made me mad.
i took two cabs this weekend because my dad wanted to see the intrepid aircraft carrier, which is off 12th avenue and he has a really hard time walking. so that made it hard to get around anywhere. 12th avenue is far fucking away you guys. i kind of wish i could take cabs more often, one of the guys was really cool. he was retired and drove a cab on the weekends for 'pocket money' (which is kind of crazy, driving a cab is HARD work). anyway, he had traveled extensively in europe doing purchasing for the US government and had some definite opinions about green power and the next steps for american economic development. and we had a bit of a discussion about nixon causing all the problems. honestly, the more i think about it, it was a totally awesome conversation.
oh and a cat update! he did so well while i was out of town! i was pretty fucking worried about him getting too lonely or frantic by himself (he's very dog-like in his excitement when you come home) but he was fine. apparently he got a little nippy at my dad and sister when they where home in my apartment when i wasn't, but he can be like that if you try to pet him when he's not in the mood. maybe he just likes me best because i saved his ass and he got to be GRATEFUL, son! this weekend's separation was a good test for us both. he's fine for a few days by myself, and i learned that i most definitely consider new york city 'home'. intractably.
my roommate is moving back to kansas. i might have a room opening up in january. a friend might be moving in, but she isn't sure. however, if you are looking for a jan-april sublet and might be interested in a gorgeous place in east harlem, or know of someone who might be, let me know!
oh snap if this was an improv scene, john frusciante would have some notes for me! and no, i am not going to explain that.
57 minutes ago