Tuesday, October 28, 2008

denmark, blood, tragedy (nHamletC)

they have giant m&ms with mint centers, like a junior mint.

they also have savory hard candies that i have to spit out after 15-20 seconds because hand candy that isn't sweet is fucking WEIRD.

the best danish candy i've eaten is a little rectangular sugar baby type thing; it's a little less chewy and sweet than your average american sugar baby, and i've eaten like 30 since yesterday.

denmark is crazy.

additionally, this week is totally insane for me; this past weekend i worked from 9-12:30 working tech and setting up the theatre for killgore, the messiest horror comedy show in the universe. last night we had tech from 11:30 pm until (fuck me) 3:30 am. i got home at quarter past 4. fortunately i made myself take a nap after work so i am not dead right now, but it's still not fun. we have the full dress rehearsal tonight, WITH fake blood (all rehearsals have been with water up until now). it's gonna be disgusting. everyone better come to this show and LOVE IT to make it up to my poor brain. the shows are wednesday, thursday and friday nights, and there's three shows each night.

this means i probably won't be dressed up or hanging out for halloween. i am bummed about that, but i can't see myself doing anything except going home and scrubbing fake blood out of my ears friday night. we'll see.

Monday, October 27, 2008


i just realized that ainsley hayes (west wing) and harriet hayes (studio 60 on the sunset strip) have the same last name. that's right, two feisty blonde republican characters written by aaron sorkin, and based on his ex-gf kristin chenoweth, also have the same last name.

come on aaron sorkin. really... come on! i know you have like 4 stories and 6 characters total, and i also know that i will watch them in whatever form you choose to distribute them, but really? you didn't have a different last name in the arsenal?

i miss discussing west wing with college friends.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

i went to her elementary school

in honor of the fact that i seem to have mutually been written off and also written off 80% of my college career, here is an awesome fact about my hometown of uxbridge, massachusetts; the pissant, one-mcdonald's-having, white trash mecca, rural, twice the population of the capital of vermont small town that vomitted me out at the age of 17:
Given the important nature of the vote, the landowner and taxpayer status of Josiah's estate, and the fact that young Bazaleel, Caleb's younger brother, was just a minor, the townspeople voted to allow Lydia, "the widow Josiah Taft", to vote in this important meeting.[10][1] Lydia then received Josiah's proxy to vote in this important town meeting. Lydia Chapin Taft then became the first recorded legal woman voter in America. Lydia Chapin Taft, now simply known as Lydia Taft, voted in an official New England Open Town Meeting, at Uxbridge, Massachusetts, on October 30, 1756. This is recorded in the records of the Uxbridge Town Meeting. Lydia Taft of Uxbridge became the first woman to ever vote in the nation.[11][10] Judge Chapin records in his 1864 address to the Unitarian church, that, "Uxbridge may yet become famous as the pioneer in the cause of Women's suffrage".[10] This was written 56 years before women's suffrage became legal in America. Lydia Taft's historic vote would precede the constitutional amendment for women's suffrage, which was in 1920, by 164 years. In 2007, Uxbridge may still become famous in the history of women's suffrage. According to Judge Chapin, the vote to allow Lydia to vote in 1756, was following the tradition of "no taxation without representation".[10]

some of those sentences don't make sense, but hey; that's wikipedia for you. lydia taft, neƩ chapin, was actually born in mendon, and became a resident of uxbridge only when part of mendon was ceded to uxbridge. that area is where my parents now live; fuck yeah, route 16! another interesting* fact about uxbridge, and that whole area of blackstone valley, is that most of the towns were divided up into (sometimes formalized) villages during the industrial revolution. in one area, two actual towns border one another; northbridge and uxbridge. however, the smaller mill villages of whitinsville, north uxbridge, linwood and another one i always forget all overlap one another. and whitinsville and north uxbridge have their own zip codes and post offices, despite not being real towns. and they each have different property tax laws.

and you guys thought the weekend subway schedule in astoria was complicated.

i also went to the taft elementary school, although i believe that it is named after husband, not her. the tafts were a big family in early massachusetts history.

*not actually interesting

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

the sandwich was replaced

i went back to wichcraft and apologized for taking the wrong sandwich, and they made me a new one. and gave me fancy sandwich cookie; lemon poppy seed filled with blueberry jam.

and a cinnamon roll.

additionally, one of the people i support just stopped by and gave me REALLY fancy chocolate cupcake leftover from 'tea time' (she's australian). adorable!

the universe seems to be telling me that baked goods are an acceptable alternative to actual happiness, and i think i agree with it. them? do you address the universe in the plural or the singular? i mean, there's one, but there's also possibly (definitely?) an infinity of them. shit, can we really not get away from the trinity versus unity question, western intellectual thought? it's been like... 1800 years, at least.

i am going home shortly. i will sit on my couch for no more than 2 hours vegging, and then i will go to bed. it will be good for my soul, since my soul was forced to watch 6 full hours of improv but had a mere half a quesadilla for 'dinner' yesterday. that's bad, even according to my pathetic standards. sorry soul!

feelings are legitmate

therefore i am pissed off, frustrated, tired and out of sorts. i want to fucking punch someone. fuck. this might be because i haven't eaten lunch yet and wichcraft gave me the wrong sandwich, and i can't eat the one they gave me, so my blood sugar is at dangerously pissy levels.

a ton of sarcastic thanks heaped right back atcha.

if i can end this day with anything besides GRUMBLE GRUMBLE GRUMBLE i'll be ever so slightly less frustrated than i am now.

Monday, October 20, 2008


is terrible. and right now it's sitting in my chest, waiting until tomorrow to make me cough. LAME.

i need to buy cat food and litter tonight. oh and roach traps. YUCK. do they make cat proof traps? ugh i dunno. i hate bugs. and i need to go to bed early tonight.

i found an itunes library at work that has a bunch of the national stuff that i don't, so i am listening to that and trying to find the snl sketches i missed on saturday. i found amy's palin rap, which was badass, and the mcgruber runner,. which are always fun, but that's it.

i got some more work to do.

improv update:
my 600 class is going well. it's a very supportive group onstage, for the most part. apparently my new go-to moves are to assume that retarded people always want to eat food out of the garbage and to ask people why their dicks are out. and apparently there is no difference between the way i play a crackhead and the way i play an old drunk man. in my defense, i know very few crackheads. also in my defense, i was on some pretty serious medication to stop my body from telling me to pass out. SNAP - was i high? i don't think so. we are making solid progress though, i think, and i pretty optimistic about the whole thing.

i stayed out to see reuben williams on saturday. i hadn't seen them since DCM! what! that's nuts! i used to see them every week! it was quite fun. they also happened to do a deconstruction, which is the form we are doing in the 600. it was very helpful to see it be done by an experienced team. i am very glad our performance class has had a form in mind from the begining. i think it's helped us greatly to focus on a goal. looking at other 600s with a critical eye (and no offense meant towards anyone involved), i think many itierations have failed because of a desire to invent a form that reflected the goal of the class. i think 8 weeks is just not enough time to focus on goals of the class as well bonding as a group AND a performing team, to also invent an entire form as well. basically, i think improv teams invent forms when they trust one another and have a great dynamic - teams that have often been together, learning one another's playing style for a year or more. forcing the creation of a form is just that, forced. it rarely seems work well.

trust is an under-utilized improv tool, i think. people tend to appreciate it when it comes about, and extol its virtues, but rarely do they do anything to actively foster or create trust (thanks to nicole for reminding me of that) besides hanging out. and coming from a background of group-process study, i know how much simple trust tools can change how any individual feels about and reacts to a group. it's something i've been wanting to discuss and implement, but which i am not really in a position to do so. i think i need to start discussing it more, at the very least.

seeing shark tank perform on friday night made me miss performing with a team. they had a lot of fun out there with each other. sigh. plus they did a scene about the worst rollercoaster ever (i think it raped them at one point, and then ruined the economy); who doesn't want to be a part of that?

in other news i managed to stab my lip open with my thumbnail during a wild gesture friday night... while doing some silly bit. LAME TOWN, population: me.

Thursday, October 16, 2008


i have had glasses for about 6 months now. i am still getting used to them in some ways. it took 3 different pairs from www.zennioptical.com to find a pair whose style i love. i saw some interview with adam duritz, where he talked really frankly about his extensions (his dreads are and always have been extensions) and how the first time he got them, he looked in the mirror and thought 'yeah, that's me'. i sort of feel that way about my glasses. even so, i don't know what i would wear them all the time if they didn't help me see better.

going down stairs still makes me kind of dizzy, as i realize i usually just glance at them as i skip down; but if i try to with my glasses on, i see the stairs half sorta fuzzy and half perfectly. and i have retained this habit of pushing my glasses up into my hair when i walk into a store or starbucks, like i used to with my sunglasses. it's weird.

i don't remember if i ever posted it here, but i have a tumblr now too. sometimes i post there more often. www. rubysneakers.tumblr.com check it out if you want.

and now, for my favorite new internet meme:

birch beer

i found out last night that the astor place kmart stocks stewart's birch beer and i had kittens of happiness in the store. and then my head exploded into candy at the site of all the happiness kittens.

i brought one into work to drink with lunch and it's so satisfying. best soda. i think i used up most of my bonus meals my freshman year buying them from the diner.

the tomato basil with tortellini 'soup' (which i got to compliment the 'mozzarella and fontina but just kidding there's really no fontina in it' sandwich) is really just an excuse to put 4 tortellini in a serving of pasta sauce. don't get me wrong, i love tomato sauce, but for realz, bistro cafe? COME ON.

lunch was great anyway. BIRCH BEER.

i can't stop reading about the campaign and the debates. if you missed it last night, i highly recommend tracking the videos down. the whole night really blew my mind. mccain came off as petty and whiny, when he wasn't insulting obama's intelligence and then calling him elitist in the same breath (let's take a minute to remember who went to harvard and has a JD, and who graduated 894 out of 899 from the naval academy), he was jerking and blinking like the apoplectic curmedgeon he is. obama stayed SO cool, calmly responding to most of mccain's points carefully, completely and dare i say it? eloquently. that was some great television. and bob scheifer was great! really, and admirable and aggressive job with the moderation sir.

oh, and towards the end mccain confused autism with down's syndrome and then spouted a bunch of bullshit about no child left behind and i got pissed. good times.

Saturday, October 11, 2008


i have intended to buy food clips every day since wednesday and have still managed not too. i suck.

however, i did write a sketch show yesterday. yes, i am serious. one of the sketches was already written, but i basically rewrote it to fit it in. i can't decide if i love it or if i hate it. so i am working on editing it now. i was going to edit it all this afternoon, but instead i bought the 'new' terry pratchett book, FINALLY. all books should be released in mass market paperback form first, 'making money' came out 2 damn years ago. there is actually an actually new terry pratchett book just out, but the damn thing is 16.99. FUCK THAT!!11

i was really looking forward to a nice night in, doing laundry and enjoying a delicious dinner. however, i felt terrible all evening and now i have no energy. i am still going to do those things, but now i will be real tired while doing them.

i just remembered i bought sweeney todd like 4 weeks ago and still haven't watched it. i am awful. yay night in!

time to switch to the drier! wish me luck.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

rebound guys

i shot a teensy part for this a while ago, and the series is finally finished. hooray! great job, everyone.

take a looksy.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

surviving in new york, and also, bits

i don't have any clips for bags of food. i've lived in new york for 2 and half years. in my own apartment. i lived by myself in college for three years, and i had a kitchen for most of that time. so how is it possible that i have avoided collecting this rather vital piece of food storage ephemera?

i think it's probably because i keep all my opened food in the refridgerator. including bags of chips. it is because i am deathly afraid of pests and roaches. which is basically really dumb because my roommate routinely leaves between 3 and 12 open and only partially eaten boxes of cereal in his half of the cabinetry, along with a helpful smattering of delicious crumbs and froot loops around the counters and floors. i choose to think that means that my respect for another's lifestyle choice outweighs my desire not to cry and scream in terror and not just lazy. i am also pro-choice and very liberal so i guess that is actually pretty internally logical of me.

and i, of course, am definitely part of the griminess problem, but i do make some effort. it's hard to make ALL the effort though.

and it means if we (knock on wood) ever get pests, i won't be the one to almost eat a cockroach out of a chip bag and subsequently find out, since my stuff will be in the refridgerator and therefore SAFE!


i met ryan reynolds a couple years ago (he's a friend of a friend, oh gosh i am SO cool) and he was really incredibly nice and funny, but also polite and extremely handsome. and he was totally into doing bits. i didn't call them that then, but that's what they were. being silly and playing a fun little game. it was really fun. i didn't think too much of him before that night, but afterwards i knew he was totally awesome.

i have a newish bit where i insist that i've written sitcoms about my friends who live together, even if they don't actually live together. then i sing the theme song of the sitcom. surprisingly, i've actually done it a lot to different people. it's always fun. i also like complaining about the casting, and insist that i wanted b-list actors for most of the parts, but that the studio insisted i use my friends instead.

i've been saying NAILED IT! alot. only when the bit is awkward or dumb to begin with, and obviously not working. alternately, assuring my audience that the random thing i just did was a 'REALLY good bit. like, really SOLID.'

FUCK i just got lavender ink on my new white sweatshirt FUUUUUCK. this is not a bit. damn it damn it damn it.

now i am doing laundry tonight. FUCK.

OH and my newest bit is one where i introduce a topic, only to end up only talking about a celebrity i've met.

Monday, October 6, 2008

corporate rudeness

so i wrote a whole big thing a few weeks ago about an incident i had at starbucks, where i nearly stormed out in rage. last week, the new starbucks i've been going to daily as a part of my 'new job' routine did an awesome thing; they gave me my drink, and then offered me, proactively, a 'messed up drink' coupon because they'd run out of caramel sauce and couldn't make the drink QUITE as perfectly as they normally do. it was very cool of them, and one of the many reasons i've made that one my daily starbucks place, even though it's tiny and pretty cramped. way to go, starbucks by the grand central market! you rock!

FORTUNATELY, levi's jeans and co. seems to have snagged the 'annoying corporate entity driving katey to fits of rage' title.

i need new jeans. i bought a new pair a few months ago, but they ended up not really working. they are pretty loose, and get much looser after i wear them for a day. too loose. also, they are really roomy in the thigh. i have weirdly small thighs right above my knees. i know that sounds strange, but my calves are somewhat bigger than my knees, and about the same diameter as my thigh until about halfway up my thigh. weird or not, (and it is, jeremy) most women's jeans are made much roomier in that area. so i went to like 4 stores on saturday, trying to find a pair. finally, finding myself at levi's in soho, i half blindly grab a few to try on. i did try on a pair of skinny jeans that didn't look TERRIBLE, but i was too bothered by the denim grabbing at my calves and ankles. finally i found a pair that i liked. don't LOVE them, but they were okay. i was still pretty on the fence about getting them, but i figured i would make a more reasoned determination away from the terrible pall cast by the awful dressing room lights.

i waited in line behind two people, still not loving the jeans, when finally the clerk calls 'next in line, please'. i step forward (after having made eye contact with him several times) and then suddenly he snaps 'MA'AM THE LINE IS IN THE MIDDLE'. he totally fucking yelled at me. i was scolded like a dog or an ignorant child in the middle of a fucking retail establishment. i made a couple indignant noises in the back of my throat, turned around, tossed the jeans on the nearest table and marched out of there. i even caught the asshole's eye as i was walking out, and he totally knew he'd just lost a sale. those fuckers get some kind of commission too. i was so mad as i was leaving, just wanted to commiserate with and or punch someone. and soho's a bad neighborhood to be in when you want to punch someone, because it's full of rich self-indulgent douchebags and their kids, clogging up the beautiful streets with their braying.

i dunno... i've worked at several retail places in my day, and i would never would have DREAMED of snapping at a customer like that, even if they deserved it, which i hadn't, because i hadn't even said anything. and i'd waited behind other people in my 'line', even though it was apparently a fucking crime to consider it a line. AND i'd gotten there well before the person in the middle had. what a douche.

in conclusion, i still need jeans. there's this website my friend sent me where you can order $50 custom jeans. i need to buy a clothing measuring tape but i think i will probably do that.

damn you, american eagle for quitting making jeans that actually fit me.

watch this

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

a literal 'translation' of the 'take on me' a ha music video. and one of the funniest things i've seen in ages.

i finished reading a book


i was going to write a review, but now i don't wanna.

i wish i had a washing machine in my apartment.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

so lazy

congestion is the worst. i really want to get some jeans today.

okay bye!

oh right, i am teching a show tonight at 10:30 at the player's loft right by washington square park! fat penguin hosts fwand! and then a mash up of the two teams! what fun!

Friday, October 3, 2008

katey needs

some dance music; a mix of older hip-hop hits and new shit. for tonight, before 8. a zip file of stuff would be best. www.yousendit.com is easy and free and not mostly in german. if you are able to help a gal out, leave me a comment with your email address and i can even walk you through the steps of zipping the files and using yousendit.

thanks it advance.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

3rd also

i love british people.

one of my coworkers is so passionately british and it makes me oddly happy to hear her flip out about shit. crackin me up!

i just realized

i only know of one picture of david gray wearing glasses;


um, if i haven't mentioned it before, i have a very strange attraction to glasses. and i think it all stems from one person in college. maybe it started before then, but i am not sure.

i am weird.

also. i still hate that being a snarky bitch who likes to be silly means that some people (it's always certain personalities) think it's okay to call you a snarky bitch. maybe it is okay, but it doesn't mean that i am okay with it, or magically not hurt by it.

2nd also. katie, if you still read this, drop me a comment or email so i know you haven't been eaten by nashville monsters, okay?


has a new salted hot chocolate. i made a fool of myself yesterday morning, slurping and licking the small paper cup of the sample i was given. the top was DOUSED in caramel sauce, which helps everything.

i make excellent hot chocolate. with red pepper, hand cut marshmallows and other deliciousnesses if i have them on hand.

that's really all i feel like talking about right now. AWESOME.